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Personal Growth
Old Mindset: Troubles for being friends with boys

Old Mindset: Troubles for being friends with boys

This god damn COVID ruined everything for us. We are left running in circles, chatting with our online social media friends, establishing new relationships while straining the others. However, the most difficult thing has been to manage friendship with our male best friend. Isn’t it? Staying all day home has made it even more difficult to chat with them. Every day is a surgical strike, parent missiles attacking us while we are trying our best to dodge them from one room to the other.

Disclaimer: Anything discussed further is not the work of fiction but an inspiration taken from my certain dumbass friends. Any reference to any person or incident is not coincidental and directly points out the person to bully him (yes in a friendly way).

Let’s begin with the definition of a friend. Who is a friend? A person with whom we have a bond of mutual affection, usually exclusive to sexual or family ties. The word ‘person’ itself is uniformly gender-unbiased and nowhere tells us that we are only subject to the same gender friendship.

Girls talking to their male friends.
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In spite of this fact, Indian families just keep on babbling the dialogue of Maine Pyaar Kiya, “Ek ladka aur ladki kabhie dost nahin hote”. (A boy and a girl can never be friends). Indeed Bollywood has fueled this thought by initially portraying the actors and actresses as best friends but they eventually ended up as lovers.

I know most teenagers can’t even talk at home. Strict orthodox parents, constantly annoying online classes, and chugalkhor siblings make everything difficult. Girls, I know most of us can’t even tell our parents about our male friends let go of our boyfriends.

Our phone’s contact list is weird in a way that no one else knows- Risbabh ka Rishika, Yash ka Yashika, Akshat ka Akshita, Ankit ka Ankita, and the list goes on. We all have done this for at least one name to trick our parents into thinking that all people we talk with are girls. (Tbh these boys are similar, coz ykw they gossip more than those mean girls of the class, sigh).

Parents peeping into the mobile phones of their daughters.
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Chatting? My parents would come out of nowhere as if they had some kind of superhuman ability to track my movements. And then I have to just quickly change from WhatsApp or Instagram (Fake Id, Zindabaad) to anything. (Geez, they still catch us red-handed)Face time or video call? A good face or the will to sacrifice your sleep is one of the things required for it. But this COVID has made our asses so lazy that sacrificing sleep has become difficult too.

Gossiping about male friends.
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Don’t we all remember how we used to tease our friends on talking to the opposite gender? How we as girls started to call them by names and making our girlfriend believe that she had something for that boy who might have just talked to him for the first time.

You see there is a thin line here. We all are equally responsible for not understanding their relation. We took it in a friendly yet in the wrong way. It’s easy to blame our elders for taking the boy-girl friendship to another level but we did the same. We never noticed this as we were busy blaming the outside world. You must be thinking that ‘Friendship mei toh sab chlta hai dude’ but it’s not the same always.

Your words or actions may hurt or discourage the other that in the future he/she may hesitate of having a friendship with the opposite gender because of the fear or embarrassment that his/her friends will take it in some other way. I know, ‘dost hai to chedhna hai’ but let’s not forget the clear line.

So from today, let’s change our attitude a bit. Try to change from within then only you can change the mindset of others. Yes, changes are difficult but let’s keep a small check. We cannot completely give away this habit of teasing our friends but can do it in a way that they are not hurt. Love to all my readers. Thank you for reading to support me.

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